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LANGUAGE IN THE TIME OF POLITICS

by editor

THEY are not new, but by virtue of the uses (and abuses) to which they are being deployed, they deserve more than a cursory glance. They define the thoughts, actions and inaction of some of the leading actors on our national stage. They convey to us the feelings of our leaders and offer us a glimpse into the fecundity of their minds.

They are words and phrases that have been effectively used by some of our compatriots to comment or act on the state of the nation. But, this is not just another voyage into the world of linguistics. Nor is it a matter of semantics as an end in itself. No. After all, words are mere vehicles conveying our thoughts.

When the literary giant, Prof. Wole Soyinka, said President Muhammadu Buhari had committed some “unforced errors”, some excited lawn tennis enthusiasts were wondering whether the Nobel laureate had been sweating it out on the court to keep fit. Before anybody could find out if tennis was the secret of Soyinka’s agility and trim figure, politicians had seized upon the innocent phrase as a weapon to fight their battles.

Akwa Ibom Governor Emmanuel Udom got an award from the Nigeria Television Authority (NTA), sparking an outrage in the camp of the All Progressives Congress (APC) in the state. The party claimed that the governor had done nothing to earn the award, which they never claimed was not worthy of the importance the giver and the recipient attached to it. The APC wrote to the Secretary to the Government of the Federation (SGF), complaining that a Federal Government institution should not have honoured the governor, who belongs in the opposition Peoples Democratic Party (PDP). The party said it thought little of it until Udom “turned the award into a political campaign slogan”.

The APC urged SGF Boss Mustapha to call Udom to order as, according to the party, he was planning to erect billboards carrying his photograph while receiving the award from the SGF. It is still unclear if Mr Mustapha accepted this plea. Or whether Udom will agree to be called to order.

Minister of Information Lai Mohammed also got an open letter from the APC on the award. The party wondered why the NTA should honour Udom.  That Udom got the award , the PDP said, was “an unforced error”.

Not willing to turn the other cheek, the PDP fought back, calling the APC’s “attacks” “devilish” and “very petty”. Did the NTA actually commit an “unforced error”? Where was the APC when the NTA announced the winners of its National Service Awards? Why shut the stable after the horse had escaped? Should the governor not be allowed to enjoy the excitement of his prize?

Isn’t the “forced error” actually APC’s? Why didn’t the party approach a court of competent jurisdiction to seek an order that Udom should not be honoured by the  Federal Government, its proxies, agencies, representatives, officials, servants and any other who may be directed, permitted and requested to confer such honours? Besides, it could also seek a declaration that the governor deserved no honour?

Ever since a Joint Admissions and Matriculation Board (JAMB) official claimed that a mystery snake swallowed N36million belonging to the agency, the word “swallow” has taken on a new meaning. The official is said to have since recanted, saying the cash was actually collected from her by her boss.

Despite that, some Nigerians have been claiming that animals, including monkeys, are swallowing cash. When President Buhari went to Ghana’s independence anniversary celebration, he promised that Nigeria would assist that country to fight corruption. The innocuous pledge became the subject of cruel jokes. Ghanaians were saying we should capture the snake that swallowed  N36million before lending them a hand.

At restaurants now, it is no longer fashionable for diners to request for “swallow”. Asked if he would like to have rice and beans or “swallow”, a patron would simply retort: “Me, swallow? Am I a snake?”

Until Senator Shehu Sani (Kaduna Central) let the cat out of the bag on the delicate matter of senators’ salary and allowances, it was as if the words “jumbo” and “bumper” had become obsolete. A senator gets N13.5million monthly running cost and a salary of N750, 000. Besides, there is N200million for constituency project.

“I decided to burst it open. It was a moral issue,” Sani told the BBC. Senate spokesman  Aliyu Sabi Abdullahi confirmed Sani’s assertion, saying it was not new. Now many Nigerians are saying the “jumbo” running cost must be reduced or stopped altogether. Some are pushing for the “bumper” salary to be reviewed.

Others are demanding an explanation of what the “running cost” actually stands for. Has the National Assembly become a factory? There are those who have called for the abolition of the National Assembly, saying as usual without facts and figures that it is a conclave of thieves who are bound together by a common goal – to loot the treasury and drop crumbs for their constituents.

They have been deriding senators as greedy, lazy and shameless. Is this fair?

The business of lawmaking is hazardous, riskier than working a rice milling machine, physically and mentally exerting. Sleepless nights, oversight duties, public hearings, motions, counter-motions, seminars and more. And all that for  chicken-feed.  Given the sacrifice of our lawmakers, I am afraid, we will all wake up some day to find out that they have gone on strike for a better pay and an environment conducive to their job.

No prize for guessing the would-be mover of the motion for a better pay for legislators?

The word “reconciliation” seems to have got more prominence since President Buhari chose Asiwaju Bola Ahmed Tinubu to lead the battle for peace in the ruling APC.  To many, the task is Herculean, but those who are familiar with Asiwaju’s tenacious grip on whatever cause he believes in have no doubt that he will succeed.  However, the popular question is, would there have been any need for a peacemaker if the party leadership was alive – morally and practically?

When former President Olusegun Obasanjo issued his controversial “special press statement” in which he lashed out at the Buhari administration, he spoke of the need for a “third force”. He then threatened to form a Coalition for Nigeria Movement. Weeks after, former Cross River State Governor Donald Duke and former Osun State Governor Olagunsoye Oyinlola stormed Abuja to join Ahmadu Ali (remember him? The one who got shoved off the PDP chair and, thereafter went into the political cooler) and others to present the Coalition.

Ever since, it has remained a mystery how this “third force” will take concrete form.  Obasanjo, a sworn statesman, who has publicly renounced politics, has been strutting across the land – from Bayelsa where he had lunch at former President Goodluck Jonathan’s home to Makurdi where he laid a wreath at the graveside of the victims of herdsmen’s attacks.

Some of Obasanjo’s associates have dumped the PDP for the Social Democratic Party (SDP). Is SDP the “third force”? The party denies it all. And the old fox, the mischievous chief, keeps them guessing.

 

The blind versus Okorocha

THERE is so much discontent in the land. Protests in Benue over killings by herdsmen. Anger in Plateau over killings. More protests over abductions – of Chibok and Dapchi girls – by Boko Haram. Pensioners are up in arms against governments.  Lawyers marched on Tuesday in Lagos over the Land Use Charge, which the government is ready to discuss.

In Imo State, an unusual kind of protest was staged on Monday. Hundreds of people with visual impairment, under the aegis of the Nigeria Association of the Blind (NAB) marched on the Government House in Owerri, blocking the gates.

Their grouse?

Non-payment of their “welfare packages, annual subventions and unfulfilled promises by the governor”. Governor Rochas Okorocha said NAB leader Mr Kalu Christopher promised to establish a Special School for the Blind. “No blind person in Imo has access to education, except those who can afford to travel to Ebonyi and Enugu states… .We met the governor in 2013. He promised that the school would take off in September 2014.But in November when we led a protest to him, you know what the governor told us? He said to us ‘had it been you came earlier, you would have seen truck carrying gravel to the new school site’.

“But, since that 2014 till today, we have not seen the truck or the gravel and not even the school site has been shown to us. It is only in Imo State that a leader in that high position can openly lie without minding the effect.”

Poor fellows. It is not only in Imo that leaders lie; they lie all over the place – with impunity. An activist has suggested that His Excellency should rather shelve his plan to erect more statues and pump the cash into building the school for the blind–as being recommended by some so-called experts–he should mount a huge statue of  the NAB leader in Owerri.

That way, he said, the blind would  have a sense of belonging. Besides, Okorocha could set up a ministry for the blind and appoint one of his sisters as commissioner. Or draft in one of his in-laws who are eyeing his seat to be Special Assistant on the Blind Affairs.

But Okorocha is not all sentiment.  He is also a man of equity.  Those who know him well say they would not be surprised if they woke up one day and found that he had erected a monument to the blind in the Owerri city centre.

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